The actress reveals the life lessons she’s learned after three decades in Hollywood with some strong personalities, becoming a mother, and exiting The Church of Scientology.
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"I don't want to be known as this bitter, ex-Scientologist," Leah Remini told BuzzFeed over a recent lunch at the luxe Sunset Tower hotel in Los Angeles. "I'm not trying to bash anybody and I'm not trying to be controversial. I just want people to know the truth."
But the truth has been especially hard for the court of public opinion to pinpoint in the months since the actress very publicly defected from The Church of Scientology in June 2013, given the notoriously confidential Church's ability to quickly close ranks and target defectors whenever their practices come into question.
Remini's then-friend and Church member Kirstie Alley called her "repulsive" and "a bigot" during an interview on Howard Stern's show, and the 43-year-old actress spent much of what she refers to as a "devastating" time, hysterically crying as friend after friend abandoned her for doing what she considered "the right thing."
Remini has since learned, albeit the hard way, that honesty isn't always the best policy in Hollywood, a place she's called home since 1983 when her pregnant mother, Vicki, could no longer stand the living conditions her daughters endured at The Church of Scientology's Clearwater, Florida location.
"We went from a middle-class lifestyle [in Brooklyn, N.Y.] to living in a roach-infested motel with six other girls off a freeway in Clearwater," Remini recalled of her family's transition to the Church's compound in Florida, before her 10th birthday. "We were separated from our mother. We had to sign billion-year contracts we didn't understand. And we kept saying, 'Why are you doing this to us? Why are we here?'"
Leah with sister Nicole
Leah Remini
The answer was simple: Their stepfather (her parents had separated when she was young) had convinced their mother to move the family — which, at that time, included Remini, her mom Vicki, and her sisters Nicole and Christina — to Florida. Though the women made the long trek to the Church's gates in Clearwater, their stepfather never followed. But there was no time to mourn the loss of their father figure since they were immediately thrown into service.
"We were working from morning until night with barely any schooling," Remini said of her early days at the Church. "There was no saying no. There was no being tired. There was no, 'I'm a little girl who just lost her father and everything I've ever known.' There was only, 'Get it done.'"
"If the church needed a ballroom wall knocked down, you made it happen because there were heavy repercussions if you didn't," Remini continued. "And although that was horrendous for a child to deal with, at the same time, it gave me my work ethic."
Eventually Remini's mother, who was, by then, pregnant with her fifth daughter, tired of life in Florida and packed up her girls for a necessity-fueled exodus.
"Oddly, moving to L.A. had nothing to do with me wanting to be an actress," said Remini, who was forced to put her childhood dream of starring in Annie on the backburner when they left New York. "My mother had a friend who was willing to take us in for a month until we could get on our feet. So we lived on her floor. It was pretty traumatic, but I found my strength through my mother in that time because she never once made us feel like we wouldn't be OK."
But Remini's adjustment to L.A. was anything but smooth.
"I went back to school, but it was nearly impossible to re-acclimate after Florida, especially since I was going to be an actress and didn't think I would need an education," she said.
After repeatedly rejecting her daughter's requests, Vicki finally allowed her teenage daughter to drop out of public school, knowing she would still be receiving an education at The Church of Scientology.
"She didn't feel like I was missing out on a real education," Remini noted. "The only thing that mattered was that we were taking courses — and not taking drugs."
In no short time, the 13-year-old aspiring actress found herself with an agent — and an audition for acclaimed casting director John Levey (Head of the Class, China Beach, Growing Pains) — thanks to Juliette Lewis, whom she befriended hanging out "in the bad part of town," in Remini's words.
"I went to the $5 clothing store, bought myself a miniskirt, some Skippies, and I walked into that audition being my most Brooklyn," Remini recalled with a smile. "I was being a total smart ass and John's laughing, so I'm thinking, This guy loves me and I'd be showing up on a set the next day." Levey would later tell Remini she delivered one of the worst auditions he'd ever seen, but that initial vamping made an impact as he recognized something special in this incredibly un-Hollywood young lady. He called her back for audition after audition, until she eventually landed a very — very — brief guest role on Head of the Class.
"John Levey begged the producers to give me the part, not because I deserved it," Remini said with a candor that's omnipresent in nearly every sentence that escapes her mouth. "But, I do believe when it's your turn, it's your turn. I envision Hollywood as a race and some people simply drop off before their turn comes around. It's all about stamina — your ability to get back up and keep going even though everything is pointing at the odds not being in your favor."
Not long after that, Remini's stamina paid off.
She was spending her days working at an insurance company, and Remini remembers, like yesterday, the moment she was called to audition for ABC's Who's The Boss? spin-off, Living Dolls. She was up for the role of Charlie Briscoe, a tough-talking girl from — of all places — Brooklyn. "I mean, it was me," she laughed. "I said to my mother, 'If I don't get this role, I'm not meant to be in this business.'"
After less than a year in L.A., Remini — the girl who once dreamt of belting "Tomorrow" on Broadway — had booked the lead on a major network sitcom.
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